Imperial Command of the Raccoon General

Thoughts and Memoirs of a Ring-tailed and Masked Dominator of the World

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General of the mighty Raccoon Army

Sunday, April 15, 2007

April is mine! (No, actually I prefer the Ninja Chick in TMNT)

Blogging. Blogging. Blogging. I so enjoy writing out my thoughts, for in truth I believe my strength in conveying myself is in the written word. Nevermind that I think most collegues and the like do not get me, and why I chose on debate on intellectual. philosophical matters as such, but for me there's enough idle chit chats in the world to go a hundred times over.

Nevertheless time is in short supply and weekdays have been consumed in almost its entirety by the relentless demands of the job, and the necessary gaming sessions at night. What? Necassary, you ask? Of course, it is definitely a crucial part of me, and God willing, I'd be seventy and still gaming (assuming I'd live that long.. no wait, what the heck, I'm going to live forever...). Honestly I don't get people who say its time to quit gaming or whatever childhood delights you want had and focus on work, career, family and all the so called grown-up stuff. I'm busy as hell, being one of the few being very much depended on in my team at work, yet I still game, check out updates and upgrade my PC. Sure I have less time for it, but nevertheless I make it a point to still be me. Personally I think people who declare that once they're in the grown up phase, and thus should abandon all this child's play stuffs are a bunch of sell outs. Drones. Zombies. Soul-less ones. I don't care the fact even if you're job is about entertaining, or about making games itself even, or the fact that you plan to get married soon after getting a good job. Point of the matter is whatever you do, you sold out on the one thing that brought you joy, killing a a part of you, and for that matter, selling your soul to the ever-present devil of so-called human society.

Okay I've gotten quite long on that subject, it was not my intent but I just hate sell outs, posers and conformists to stupid ideologies and traditions.

Anyways it's April and past the month of Weddings (March) i'm finaly turning 25, and doesn't that makes you sound old? Well it may sound so, but I still feel no different than when I was 18, fresh out of school and ready to rebel and humiliate in whatever way i can those silly conformists of outdated traditions. But birthday itself was cool, despite that being old and also being passed up on a new position in which i SO would like to try out. Back ground artist and design. I know I RARELY EVER do such things, but I am all out to try something new that I strongly feel I can enjoy. I was passed over however not on negative reasons, but rather that previous team suddenly fell into dire straits and needed me around still. Anyhow, it's good to be appreciated (better if I could be WORSHIPPED though.... ) and come 5th April there was a torrent of well wishers and some nifty cool birthday arts for me. A majority of the picture givers are also aware of my Raccoon-ness and some know of my fondness of girls.

That being said, MewMew promised me a treat which I am anxious for, (COME ON, buddy buddy! I want my treat MEWMEW!) though I'm guessing it's a pizza or so. (i'd ask you to get me a chick, MewMew, but I don't think you can do that yet, as I'd ask for your Sabahan-kin of super hot babes...haha~!) However Ruza did get me a treat first however, watching Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and going for Pizza and California's Pizza Kitchen, which I must say I've been dying to try for a while now. TMNT (or as the translation goes, "Ninja Penyu Mutasi Remaja") was great, barring a few comments, and I so love how they do the chicks for the animation. It's cartoony for sure, ala Incredibles, but there was just a certain sense of sexiness to the girls of the movie that was not present in most Disney-ish features.

Anyhow, on to matters of work or animation. Firstly it's been great working with good people at the office and I must say despite my achievements, there is still a lot more I need to learn. I quite like what I do and despite that I do enjoy 3D animations as well, when it comes to animating, I now solidify my stance on 2D over 3D. One thing is for sure, 2D folks have a higher ratio of artists than 3D people, and that my fellow people, is our triumph over the more techy 3D animating process. No wait, you say, aren't 3D stuff art too, you ask. It's a matter of perspective really, and I just find that drawing things, as close as you can to the process of doing it with pencil and paper, is more an art than the tweaking vertices. It's not an absolute thing, it's just how I feel on the matter, so excuse me if I have more reverence and respect for 2D animators. Personal opinion really.

MDEC animation pitch thing is out and really, I don't mind trying out again, if only I had the time. Nevertheless, Ruza said to try for it anyhow, and quite frankly, if ever I wanna do this work with anyone, it'd be her. For reasons of personal ambition I suppose, in that we both aspire the same thing, to tell our own stories on the silver screen, and to tell such a story that its not just the technical level that rivals the internationals, but also the aesthetics. I think we all want culture and philosophies in our stories, but unlike most people here who go on and on with MALAYSIAN culture, I think we both have desires on going with an amalgam or inclusion of the cultures of the World. Sure, id want Malaysian stuff in it, but I also want to see, western, Asiatic, or even meso american influence to it. In the end, I want to see the variety of cultures, and id star Wars can do it all the way 30 years ago, why do we still need to confine our minds within Malaysia only? It's ambitous, requiring lots of work, and time.... but with people like Ruza around backing each other up and all, win or lose, I feel it will be worth the effort.

Summarized: The RACCOON wants to create an imaginary universe, not some bubble of fictional setting in just our country.

Time, Time. Everyone's wishing for more of it, as I do. But I feel I have it good. The many people from MMU that I know have almost completely severed most of their ties to their MMU mates, save for those who can still maintain an alliance of convenience, as in working together or living nearby or even have a new friend who knows the old friend etc. But I, busy as it is at work, I still maintain my ties with my oldest of frinds in MMU, and quite frankly despite my being ever so far away at work most of the time, I still feel part of the old gang, and with a lot of effort, still maintain ties with my wonderful past. Sure, there are new enemies and annoyances these days, some people turned bad and all, but the core people, the remained true still. Omar, Naz, Raj, Mewmew, these people are my closest of MMU buddies, and I know we all have our own stuffs, but truly, I appreciate you lots still keeping me in your presence all these while. Thank you. For my part, on your behalfs, I will try not to be a sell out. I will be loyal. There no knives in the back in store for you lots! Huzzah!

Lastly I want to share a little feeling and thought I have had recently. Be true to yourself. For once, try not to listen to what society, collegues, elders, other people, would tell you. Close them out, and listen to yourself. You are responsible for your own happiness, and believe me, once you are happy with who you are, those that mean the most to you will be happy with you too.

THINK.

DECIDE.

STOP BEING A POSER. STOP TRYING TO BE LIKE EVERY ONE ELSE, DAMNIT! And stop being so naive. Greater good is not an outward thing, it is an inward process; be good, honest, truthful to yourself first before you can help the world. Make up your mind, make your own choices and for God's sake stop giving the responsibility of your happiness to other people's hands. Everyone has enough problems of their own to wrestle with, and what makes you think they'll like you any better when you give them MORE responsibilities?

Respect others, yes, but never forget that you are a person to and you want and need to be loved, admired, cheerished and respected just like everyone else too.